If you ever catch yourself hearing the words “Let’s just be friends”, “I’d like us to just be friends”, or any variation therefore, you better get yourself the f**k out of there.
…that is unless you intend, or will be content with remaining strictly as her “friend”. This also means no heavy touching, kissing, or anything physically intimate. Are you sure you want that?
When a woman tells you she wants to be friends, don’t buy any of the common excuses when you hear them. E.g “I have too much work nowadays”, “I need some time to think things over,” “I don’t want too ruin our friendship”.
My friend, when a woman categorizes you as a friend, it translates as “I am no longer attracted in you. You just don’t turn me on. Hands off me now.” Her interest level simply wandered off into no-where land, and you do not want to go chasing for it.
So, how do you crawl yourself out of this dreaded shit-hole? The question you should REALLY be asking yourself is, how did you get yourself there in the first place?
Most likely, you became too dependent and needy. Your whole schedule probably even revolved around her, and you had nothing “going on for you” other than HER. This is the type of reality that’ll turn a woman off quick like hearing a girl fart during dinner.
Ok, to the solutions board. If such scenario applies to you, here are three actions you ought to follow through: to help you possibly regain her interest level, and to help you move on from any imminent emotional repercussions from the blow in confidence.
1. Don’t be phased. If you let any signs of “being hurt” show, you’re giving her the upper hand. Stay cool and collected. Tell her upfront with a tone of sincerity that that you’re afraid that’s “not going to happen,” since that’s not the kind of relationship you can see yourself in with her. Hey, it’s your life, run it your way.
Wish her the best and tell her it was great knowing her. Don’t break down and cry over the phone insisting that you could do better. You want her to feel a sense of loss or denied access. Women want what they can’t have.
2. Avoid further contact with her. Cut loose, or go cold turkey (it’s ok to be extreme in this case) on the text messages, e-mailing, or whichever form of communication she got used to. Get on with your life and business.
3. Instill jealousy. Meet and hang out with other women. Don’t do so forcibly out of revenge though. Do it because you intend on meeting other quality women, and yes, there are plentiful out there! You never know who’s available until you start shopping!
By increasing your social factor, you inadvertently pump up your perceived value in her eyes. Let her know that you are in demand, and that you can have a smashing time with other women. Once she realizes that she’s missing out on the fun, her interest level will naturally shoot back up.
Needless to say, do learn from your past. Track back and evaluate how you behaved. Did the flirting dynamic start to suck? Did you become too supplicating? Uninspiring? Non-challenging?
Did you soften up completely and handed her both your balls where she now keeps in a jar? Whatever it is, don’t repeat the same mistakes.
